Chrono-Dissonance Prophets

A Guide to Time Traveling with Style

Warning: Time traveling is not for the faint of heart. Or the faint of sanity. Or the faint of wallet. In fact, it's for the chronologically-challenged, the existentially-exasperated, and the financially-strapped.

We at the Chrono-Dissonance Prophets have been there, done that, and done it all wrong. Our methods are untested, unproven, and possibly unconstitutional. But hey, when you're time traveling, who needs laws, right?

Method 1: The Time-Traveling Toaster

It's not as crazy as it sounds. We've taken a standard toaster, stuck it in a time machine, and... well, it's still in the time machine. But it's a start! Theoretically, it should work. Theoretically.

Learn more about the Time-Traveling Toaster Protocol

Method 2: The Dissonance Displacement

This method involves creating a localized dissonance field around your person, allowing you to phase out of the timeline. It's a bit like a force field, but less... field-like. And more... dissonant.

Understand the Dissonance Displacement Theory

Method 3: The Chrono-Sphere

A sphere of pure chronon-energy, the Chrono-Sphere is a device that harnesses the fundamental forces of time and space. Or something. We're still working on the science.

Frequently Asked Questions about the Chrono-Sphere